If you’ve picked up a newspaper, turned on the television or tuned into the radio at any point in the past six years, you’ll have heard the nasal droning of our current Prime Minister as he warbles on about standards in public life. Since becoming leader of the opposition, and then eventually storming Downing Street, Sir Keir has long positioned himself as the self-appointed sober man of Britain, the nation’s designated driver – a guardian of standards and goodness.

And, barring that incident when he was snapped wolfing down a curry and a few beers with more than six people during the pandemic, he’s managed to uphold that pretence remarkably well. He demanded that Boris Johnson step aside over partygate, and he called on Dominic Raab to resign over bullying claims. Credit where credit is due, there was always one thing he was consistent on: resign, resign, resign.

But now the boot is on the other foot, and Sir Keir has discovered what a great many politicians do in the end: standards only apply when you’re not the one being scrutinised.

The Mandelson scandal has undoubtedly exposed that the Prime Minister’s judgement is catastrophically flawed. Despite the very public and easy-to-access information about the Prince of Darkness, Sir Keir pressed ahead with his appointment as ambassador to Washington, reportedly against civil service advice. When officials warned of “reputational risk”, it has been reported that the Prime Minister ignored them.

Now that the situation has developed further. It emerged that Lord Mandelson failed his security vetting – and Sir Keir’s default response to this news was to find the nearest patsy and throw them under a bus.

It is utterly inconceivable that anyone of sound mind could appoint a man whose nickname is shared with the biblical satan, and not think that maybe this might be a bad idea.

But Sir Keir did so, and now seems to be scorching and burning everything and everyone around him to explain away his own failures.

This is the same man who thundered in the Commons that Mr Johnson had “broken the rules he told everyone else to follow” over partygate. The same man who declared that “standards matter” and that “trust, once lost, cannot be regained”. The same man who built his entire political identity on being different from the Conservatives.

By his own standards, Sir Keir Starmer should resign. He appointed Lord Mandelson, despite warnings of reputational risk. Even if it is true that somehow nobody told him the peer had also failed security vetting, the damage is done. The buck stops with him.

The scandal has damaged Britain’s reputation in Washington and emboldened our critics. If this had been a Conservative prime minister, Sir Keir would be demanding their head on a platter. So why is he still there?

The answer is as simple as it is terrifying: nobody wants the job. Not now, not with local elections mere weeks away. It is to this country’s great detriment that politicians act only in their own self-interest. Labour politicians are no different – none of them wants this job until the electoral reckoning just around the corner is in the rearview mirror.

Wes Streeting knows what is coming. Angela Rayner knows what is coming. David Lammy knows what is coming. Labour is heading for a drubbing at the ballot box in May, and none of them wants to carry the can for it. Better to let Sir Keir take the blame, weather the storm, and position themselves for a leadership challenge afterwards when the damage has been done.

This is the unspoken calculation keeping Sir Keir in post. His potential successors are not defending him out of loyalty – they are protecting themselves. They want him to absorb the electoral punishment headed Labour’s way, then step aside so they can present themselves as a fresh start.

Sir Keir has been handed his P45. His colleagues just are not letting him open it yet.